Break-up Note

Things weren't going well with us lately. I knew this would come. Everything in this world is ephemeral-- except of course for change. It's one thing that makes life exciting. But with this change, I'm not excited. But somehow I feel obliged to do this. I don't know if this is what you want. But I'm sure this is what you need.

By the way you're acting lately and by the coldness in your warmth, I decided to do this. But I promise you, it was very hard. I had to cry and cry for consecutive nights just to muster the guts I need. And about those letters you've sent, believe me it was hard to read them all over again without stuffing a pillow on my mouth or biting my blanket just to prevent myself from breaking down. My room is not sound proof and my parents are just on the other side of the wall. It would be such a commotion if they hear me burst out in tears and go hysterical. And I think I had spent my entire night gazing at that ring you gave me and listening to the songs we used to sing. The songs which used to tell us everything. Now they will be nothing but melancholic melody of a past that is better off buried.

Now I'm giving those things back. It will be of no use to me anymore. Your memories in my head are enough. I've spent sleepless nights because of your face and the way you hold me, the way you would kiss me, the way you made me feel so special, and the way you say that you love me so much..

But I don't want to throw away your things so would you keep it for me, please? Give it back to me if you disagree with me breaking up with you. I would wait..

Ooh boy, I'm not ready for this yet.

Could you remember the first time we've met? Haha, your hair was dyed red then.

Could you remember how you tried to make me smile when I'm down by just treating me with a mocha frappe? Could you remember that night you fetched me and walked me home after our school trip?

Could you remember that night when I admitted to you that I've fallen for you? In that bench beneath the tree..

Could you remember last summer when I used to sneak out of our house just to watch the stars with you? Do you remember the empty streets we used to walked in the early hour of the morning when we should be sleeping? It was so peaceful.

Could you remember that day of your birthday when we went out all day..

Could you remember how I used to bite you in the shoulder and play with your arms and hands? Do you remember how you used to pinch my cheeks and tell me how beautiful I am? Could you remember how you satisfy my conceited side with praises? And your lips speaking to me again and again that I'm everything you have. Could you remember the nights when we did nothing but cry in each others arms about the failure we've become and the ups and the downs of our lives.. Could you remember how we spent those idle nights dreaming?

Could you remember how I picked you up.. How you've come back in my life after these set backs. How we've swear in to each other that nothing's gonna stop us now. That she can't break us. And that we'll surpass everything just by being in each other's side holding hands? Remember how I stood up for you and encourged you to keep our relationship intact?

And that night you gave me that ring, I was really so overwhelmed. It was such a sweet gesture from you..

And now..

Now could you remember where we failed?...

Oh my, I'm not ready to say this..
I've become so dependent of you.
I have come to love you more than what I intended to.
And I hurt myself for you more than I should.
I love you so much...

I've had enough,
Farewell my baby,
a sweet goodbye..